It’s the extra long Turkey Day Weekend break, and what’s that mean? Movies Movies Movies!
Huge update for ya this time!
First off, I’m going to through in an Honorable Mention. Honorable Mention? What the hell you talking about?
I call it this, cause I didn’t catch the whole thing, just the last 10 min or so. But regardless, seeing as it is Best of the Best how can I not post it!
An 80′s karate classic, (Tae Kwon Do, sue me) this is the showcase of Eric Roberts best role ever as the long haired underdog, (fighting with one arm no less) and Chris Penn as the fat cowboy karate master. How can you go wrong?
Next up for my turkey bloated carcass this weekend, was the recent remake of Dark Water staring Jennifer Connelley.
While the japonofiles all scream that the original was so much better, (I’m sure it was) I really can’t see myself going back to watch it. Dark Water itself is a good movie, rather gripping, and engaging, however not all that scary. (Remember: I’m desensitized) Over all, this is a bleak movie, and rather depressing! It’s worth watching through once, but I don’t recommend rewatching with out your bottle of prozac nearby! I give it a Jennifer Connelley FTW, but please! Cheer up!
Next up, we have Surviving Christmas starring Ben Affleck and James Gandolphini.
Ben Affleck is a lonely rich man with an unfullfilling love life, and no family to spend the holidays with, so he hires Tony Sopranos. With a few decent laughs spread throughout, the bottom line is…..I watched this cause my dad turned it on and fell asleep in the recliner. I give it a hearty ‘I ate too much turkey, I ain’t getting up to change it’
To continue on with our Thanksgiving Ben Affleck theme, (that’s an oxymoron if I ever saw one) we have Paycheck Hollywood’s latest attempt at bringing P.K. Dick to the the bigscreen.
Despite starring Ben Affleck, Paycheck was an enjoyable sci fi action flick, with deep story, plenty of intrigue, and a good sci fi plot to spin your wheels. Paycheck tends to get confused at time if it wants to be a futuristic thriller or alternate history piece, and seems to lack a whole lot of John Woo greatness that would have been a good fit. Lest I forgot, Paycheck also stars Uma Thurman and Paul Giamatti, who both round out this movie nicely, and turn in their typically stellar performances. Overall, I give it a ‘hell of a lot better than Surviving Christmas, but still no Best of the Best!
Breaking our Bennifer streak, we move on to The Exorcism of Emily Rose Laura Linney.
Based on a true story, Emily Rose became possessed by demons after moving off to college, and unfortunatley died during an excorcism, performed by Father Moore (Tom Wilkinson). The state takes Father Moore to trial for endagered homicide, after they believe he let Emily Rose die. Going into Emily Rose, I didn’t get what I expected. From the commercials that ran before release, I expected a little more on the scary side. What I got instead was a courtroom drama, involving creepy subjects. That aside, it was a well done courtroom drama, that pulled the viewer into the long and dark tale of poor Emily Rose. How much of this movie correlates with the real life events, I don’t know, but after watching the movie, it left me compelled to google the subject a bit and check it out. I give it 5 Hail Mary’s and a ‘go rent it, god be with you’
Starring Nic Cage, you get what you paid for. A whole lot of Nic Cage. An enjoyable take at the Indiana Jones formula for a new age, the movie is pretty full of cheese, puns, etc. Throw in a convuluted story involving US history, conspiracies on that history, I still found my self entertained. This was my 2nd viewing, and I still had to sit through to the end, just cause it was fun. That’s the bottom line for me, it’s a fun movie. Through in Nic Cage (yes, he’s cheesy, but a finely aged cheese), Jon Voight, Harvey Keitel, and the dude that played Boromir (Sean Bean) and you’ve got a pretty solid cast.
Rounding out our fine feathered holiday is Down Periscope.
A mid 90′s nonsense comedy starring Kelsey Grammer and an early Lauren Holley, a misfit Navy officer is given a misfit crew and an old dilapidated diesel sub, with a war game assignment to blow up a dummy ship in port. Their competition for this simulation? A modern nuclear sub commanded by William H. Macy. Full of stupid jokes, stupid site gags, and standard vulgar humor, it’s still worth a chuckle or two to sit through. Not the highlight of 90′s comedies, but it’s a good run of the mill 90′s comedy with redheads. I give it a…..it’s 1:15am, go to sleep!
And with that, I’m out.
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