There are some that will tell you that ice water is the key to any diet plan. Honestly, I’d have to agree. I’ve seen it first hand myself. Those same people will give you a line of scientific mumbo jumbo on metabolism rates, body temperature, etc. etc. This, unfortunately, is where I’m forced to disagree.

Ice water makes the difference for any person, on the weight decline. I’ve seen it first hand, there’s no doubt about it. Stuck on a plateau? Drink more ice water. What I think they’re failing to tell you is, most of that weight loss isn’t an effect in the rise of your metabolic rate, but more due to the dancing. Yes, the dancing. Picture yourself, half way through your rush hour commute, stuck in traffic, waiting on that slow light at Allisonville Rd. Then think back fifteen minutes earlier, and picture yourself saying stoically, ‘Nah, I don’t need to go to the bathroom before I go, I’ll make it!’ Now, look back a little bit further to the third mondo jug of ice water you finished off not 30 min. before. Feeling the urge to dance yet?

Back and forth, the bathroom your frequent friend, requires a lot of walking, and dancing if you’re running behind. This folks is the true reason ice water is key. Forget all that metabolism crap.

Yes, I rambled on about having to go to the bathroom, but it’s all I could really focus on tonight, as Frosty and I commenced our second circuit of the evening. When you find yourself sprinting in from the car upon your arrival, that’s really all that’s on your mind anyways.

Today completes a fine 2nd day, to the Fat man’s master plan. Another 1.5, another entry in the journal, and we’re all the richer for it. I find myself excited to set off on another trek with my faithful sidekick, (faithful yes, but let’s not forget stubborn) if only for a chance to ramble on once again. I may not be back in my size 36′s yet, but I’m back on track. That’s what really counts, right?

2/28/2006 – 1.5 miles, evening circuit. – A Port-a-Potty never looked so good

5:30 AM, the alarm rings. I hit the snooze, and promptly fall back to sleep. 5:40AM, history repeats itself.

5:30 AM is an unholy hour, especially for one about to pit himself against the cold and a dog not so keen on walking today.

Ponderously perched upon my bedside, I sit and think of ways to sound more intelligent. A couple big words later (as seen in previous sentences) I finally muster the gumption, to get off my ass and have at it. Donning my gear, and donning Frosty’s harness, we set forth into the dark chilly morning.

The first thought to filter through my foggy brain this day is this: Dammit dog! Dammit dog! Dammit dog!

Finally convincing Frosty that a walk is indeed a good thing, we’re finally set in motion…but not a constant motion. If it bears a post, sunk into the ground, rest assured that Frosty will investigate it to it’s fullest, insuring us that it is indeed safe, and not made from Rawhide. Frequent stops, and swearing follow, until we finally reach the end of the residential sidewalk, and into the post free area of our journey. Far less distracted, we pick up the pace.

Faced with a dark trail, wandering through the woods, wide open with nary a house in site, Frosty and I both decide that we’re not quite that brave, and turn to walk the expanse of Highway 238, and complete a loop back to our warm and inviting domicile. All is well, as Frosty finds the occasional stick, and me, I’m getting my walk in.

Not quite the 1.5 miles of the night before, but a mile none the less. Like I said, starting in late February is tough in itself, but perseverance will prevail. Hopefully, some day soon my skinny days will prevail too, and the ‘fat boy’ pants can be locked away once more.

2/28/2006 1 Mile, 271 Lbs. – Hell hath no fury, like a potato chip scorned.

Join me and Frosty as we wander (and wonder) on our daily walks!

Tonight we did 1.5 miles, on the walking path around our subdivision. Starting out warm, and growing ever colder, we managed our mile and a half goal. Time to think, clear out the cobwebs, and slowly work on this tool shed I call stomach.

Waxing Nostalgic back to skinnier days, I remember fondly my size 36 jeans, and the view of my feet from above. With a sound resolution, and hopefully willpower to match, I vow silently to Frosty that those days shall rize again. Frosty looks at me blankly, tugs on his leash, and promptly lets loose his bladder.

The days to come will be hard, it’s still in the 30′s before 8am here. I plan to start my daily stint (last summer saw 3 miles a day before 7am, daily!) with a paltry mile and a half a day, weather permitting.

I know I can do it, it’s a matter of mustering the will to do it. Hopefully this journey will bring forth some random thoughts with it as well. Not promising that, I can gurantee it will bring joint ache’s and blisters, but that comes with the territory.

2/27/06 1.5 Miles. Speedo, here I come.

Stargate SG-1 4×01 – Small Victories
Stargate SG-1 4×02 – The Other Side
Stargate SG-1 4×03 – Upgrades

Babylon 5 1×02 – Soul Hunter
Babylon 5 1×03 – Born to the Purple

Stargate SG-1 3×20 – Maternal Instinct
Stargate SG-1 3×21 – Crystal Skull
Stargate SG-1 3×22 – Nemesis

2001 Maniacs
Paranoia 1.0

Dee Snider’s Strangeland.

Okay, so maybe the horror comes more from the crappy acting than the plot.

Captain Howdy is a schizophrenic. He’s also a tattooed and pierced sadistic, who likes to inflict pain on others. Turning to the internet, Captain Howdy trolls the teenage chat rooms, luring unsuspecting teenagers and adults into his painful traps. One day Captain Howdy kidnaps the teenage daughter of a local detective, who has now made it his mission to track down and put an end to Captain Howdy. Once captured, the Captain is sent to the mental hospital. A couple of years passed, and the good Captain is now reformed and sent home! However, his neighbor’s refuse to believe, and eventually drive him back to his murderous ways. Blood and half naked Dee Snider ensue once again!

First off, the plot. It could have been good. It was a decent premise, relatively cutting edge for 1998. But, the writing killed it. Lengthy diatribes by Captain Howdy, trying to prove he’s a real smart feller, weighs down any sense of foreboding or action that they had managed to build up at this point. Second, the costumes. They tried really hard to make Captain Howdy edgy and ‘scary’. They tried for over the top, but they just wound up with Dee Snider being…well, Dee Snider. Finally, this brings us to the acting. This shit’s painful folks. I hate to drop an ‘S’ bomb on you, but that’s what it is folks! Shit! Pure and unadulterated! Dee Snider trying his best to be Crazy! The Detective is a mumbling brooding hard case, or so he would lead you to believe. Instead, you’ve got a hard up actor, desperate for his ‘break’ that carried his alcohol induced failure seeping onto the big screen with him. Let’s not mention the detective’s sidekick. It’s pretty apparent that their first choice left after reading the script, or the director promised his nephew he could have a part. I wouldn’t even call this acting, and was piss poor even to high school play standards. I can act better than this, and well, me acting just isn’t pretty!

I watched this once back in 98 when it first came out, and my reaction then was ‘meh, it was okay’. Looking back, I just don’t know what the hell I was thinking. This is painful to watch, and it’s really not surprising to see why Dee Snider’s still known as that chick from Twisted Sister, and not as an actor.

1 hack actor out of 5

Stargate SG-1 3×17 – A Hundred Days
Stargate SG-1 3×18 – Shades of Grey
Stargate SG-1 3×19 – New Ground

Stargate SG-1 3×15: Pretense
Stargate SG-1 3×16: Urgo

Werewolf in the Girl’s Dormitory

In a girl’s reform school, the hormones are rising, and the predominately male staff has the libido to match it.

A new teacher arrives, and with him comes his dark past as a Dr. with a mishap on his record. Shortly after his arrival, a student sneaks out for a late night rendezvous with the head of the School Board! After threatening to blackmail the president, the young lass is attacked and murdered while sneaking back into school! Was it the new teacher? Was it the horny school board president? Or was it something far more dark and sinister? The comely Priscilla takes it upon herself to find the answer, all while hiding it from her new found love interest, in Dr. Olcott, the newest member of the teaching staff.

Hilarity abounds in this 1962 black and white classic. However, it’s not just MST3K level humor for a change. While not groundbreaking by any means, we’re actually treated to a thought out plot, some decent mystery, and a corny werewolf! A title that could be taken in many different ways, we’re faced with our own mystery: are we waking a werewolf stalking the school grounds? Are we faced with a ‘werewolf’ in the form of the lecherous old school board president preying on the young girls for his own jollies? Or, are we faced with this mysterious new teacher with a dark spot on his past (a young female patient dying while in his office) with a bevy of new young female patients to experiment with?

For 1962, Werewolf comes across as a fairly smart mystery/political commentary. Don’t let that completely fool you though! We’re still treated to the typical 1960’s zaniness, and laughs abound, although unintentional.

A fun way to kill an hour and a half, and fun for the late night drinking crowd in our post Mystery Science Theatre age!

3.5 horny werewolves out of 5